Thursday, January 27, 2011

My Top 5 Most Hated US Reality Television 'Stars'

As much as I love television there are a lot of people on it I HATE! I hate them in an unnatural, deeply passionate way. Coincidentally they are all from US reality shows. So today I dumbing it down to gutter trash levels and profiling my…


And I use the term ‘Stars’ here very loosely. For the purposes of these pages lets think of ‘stars’ as someone with a big enough, rude enough and offensive enough personality to carry at least a 30 min program. I’m sure in their own minds they are MEGA-STARS, but to me they are only one social level above the Bali 9.

Lets start at the top and work our way down…

1. Michael ‘The Situation’ Sorrentino – Jersey Shore.
There can be lots of good, funny stuff on this show - such as Snooki. In fact, I find all the girls bizarrely watchable. But The Situation is the most obnoxious, ridiculous, self-important man ever on screen. And SO DUMB! And you know how much I hate dumb. Towards the end of Series 2 I was starting to get violent with the remote at how misogynistic and evil he was becoming. How he scored at all is beyond me. And I’m sensing a very small penis.
Just foul!
2. Patti Stanger – Millionaire Matchmaker
What I find most offensive about Ms Patti is that she holds herself up as a relationship expert. I know more about straight relationships than she does - now that’s saying something! ‘Women as meat, men to be idolised’ is a tough pill to swallow from a supposedly strong, independent woman. And don’t get me started on her wardrobe – it’s a cross between an 80’s Joan Collins and Elvira.

3. Lauren Conrad – The Hills
I know she’s long gone but I still harbor a grudge. She was just complete and utter nothingness around which a whole series was based. Everything about this woman is bland and beige. Even when she was at her most ‘dramatic’ I found myself yawning. The fact that someone this dull could go on to launch clothes, perfume and a book is disturbing. Even her website is BEIGE! She gets paid to turn up at parties; well I’d leave if she did.
Boring old LC
4. Rachel Zoe – The Rachel Zoe Project           
Thank god for gorgeous Brad, sap Roger and the much-missed Taylor or this show would be unbearable! I have an ego and a level of self-absorption greater than most, but Rachel Zoe makes me look like a humanitarian who builds schools in African villages. She has herself on a pedestal alongside Mother Teresa for her contribution to society. I have a deep fear for her poor child if she ever becomes a mother, please all pray for a boy, because they are going to grow up with some serious mother/body/psychological issues.

5. All the Mums – Toddlers & Tiara’s
If you follow my Twitter you will know that I am obsessed with Toddlers & Tiara’s. Yes, I love a pageant, but the key reason is that I despise the stage-mums (& some dads) with such a morbid fascination that I can not miss an episode. They are all so tragically obese, utterly suburban, completely delusional and entirely unlikable. It is so transparent that they are living out their own frustrated dreams through their poor tortured daughters. As much as it is the daughters who take to the stage it is the hideous mothers that are the 'stars' of this show. They repulse me and yet I can not turn away.

Now I bet I know what you’re thinking. Yes, I watch A LOT of television. Yes, even though I hate them I still watch their shows. Yes, I am the first to admit that there is something delicious about watching horrible people. And YES, I know I need to get a life.

But living in reality-tv-land is so much more fun!

Who are the US reality 'Stars' that you love to hate? Are they the same as mine?


PinkPatentMaryJanes said...

Oh, my list is basically the same as yours - that damned Situation and his abs - eeeuuuw! But, must admit, I think I love Rachel Zoe for the reasons you despise her - she makes us all look like such better people in comparison... Thanks for the giggle!

Ms Styling You said...

Rachel Zoe will become a mum in March ... and yes, I'm praying for a boy for the same reason you are!

St. Murphy said...

Just discovered that I work mate that I previously respected has read everyone of Lauren Conrad's books. I am MORTIFIED for her.

St. Murphy

Jo said...

TYRA. That is all.

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