There are some days that the well is just dry.
Actually, it’s not so much the well, but rather my head. I can not think of the next sentence, I do not think I have another sentence in me…..
Why… ???????......
Ok. I’ve got something. I’m tired – mentally and physically! It’s a combination of a huge work week and two sessions with my beloved personal trainer. Also throw into the mix I am in the final stages of a holiday countdown and everyone knows that can mess with your head.
Also throw into the mix I have bad hair. And I’ve still got a bung knee from my dramatic drunken fall at the Imperial near 3 weeks ago. And I’ve got a giant scab on my face that neither Zovirax or Betadine will get rid of. Why is that? What could it be? I’m nervous I may have picked up a rare and exotic disease when I was splayed on the floor of the Imperial.
Do you know what else makes me tired. Voicemail. Voicemail exhausts me.
I’m tired of trying to remember that I now have two sets of keys.
Why is it not appropriate for middle-aged single gay men to wear head bands in public?
Vacuuming. Vacuuming literally sucks the life right out of me. (And that wasn’t even a sad attempt at a play on words, the carpet at Man Pit is filthy!)
Why can’t there be a giant flying fox between my work and my home? Surely this is not too much to ask.
Where’s my passport?????
I’m tired of being tone deaf.
I’m tired of being expected to eat from all five food groups each day. I can’t remember what the other four are.
I have four remote controls. Surely that’s excessive. No wonder I’m tired.
Sometimes I just stop in the street and pray to someone else’s god that Foxtel was available on my iPad.
Speaking of... Why doesn't the standard iProduct charger fit the MacBook?
Speaking of... Why doesn't the standard iProduct charger fit the MacBook?
It really is exhausting being as selfish as I am. No wonder I am tired.
Who can install a doogy-poo-bag dispenser in my kitchen???
Please Coles, Woolworths, IGA, Aldi or even BiLo can you open up with a 400m maximum radius of Man Pit?
Why the hell is Dolly Parton coming to Australia and why are people excited????
Ok, now I just think I’m bordering on ridiculous…
Worst case scenario… I even think I am tired of Law & Order! (GASP, SHOCK, HORROR!)
Need to go back and read that post on the homeless in my neighbourhood. That will snap me out of my whingey, whiney stupor.
Or I could watch porn.
Goodbye. Until I have something even remotely interesting to say.
xoxoxoxo
68 comments:
Poor love, you sound a bit rundown. Maybe start loading up on vitamins if you're having difficulty with the food groups (some of those food groups are quite boring actually!), gotta get yourself well and pumping for your holiday. Try some beroccca...I swear by that shit, that and sugar free V.
I'll install the poo-bag dispenser. I'll do all the manly, screwdriver-related jobs at the Man Pit. Sigh. Not a euphemism.
I have nothing interesting to say but we could bitch about people together. BTW you are in my post today. Mwha!
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