Gay Memo: We now love sports

I have a sneaking suspicion that the gays are getting into sports. I don’t want to work everyone up into a frenzy over this but I am sensing more and more that the rainbow flag is flying at sporting events. I’ve noticed it with myself and more and more I’m noticing it within my brotherhood.

For me, it is because of Boyfriend’s influence. He brought to the relationship a great love of AFL and tennis. A few years ago he got me in a family tipping comp to make me more interested – it worked! I started out supporting 4 teams but I’ve narrowed it down to 1 – the Swans. Last season we even became members along with some friends. I’ve even been to some matches. One of them way out west at Homebush for god’s sake. That’s how committed to the AFL I’ve become.

After they won???

And it's not just because of the player’s arms and Ryan O’Keefe’s ass. There’s something about competition over 4 quarters that just builds and builds. The close matches are the best and I’ll support who’s ever behind at the start of the last quarter. I love an underdog. Which is why when Greater Western Sydney start in the comp I’ll be switching allegiance. GWS will be combining three great loves of mine – lean men, underdogs and bogans.

Last year Boyfriend and I, completely by accident, even started watching Formula 1 Grand Prixs. Now I know more about brick-laying than I do about cars but the strategy involved and the finely tuned performances are fascinating to watch. Boyfriend also introduced me to horse racing. His favourite week every year is Spring Racing Carnival. It’s not uncommon for us to be found in the back of some seedy pub placing bets on horses, trots or dogs. I pick winners based on colour of course.

Which brings me to the tennis. My Saturday night was spent watching Stosur and Tomic at the Aus Open, and Boyfriend wasn’t even home. He’s normally the tennis nut, not me. But I’ve found myself watching A LOT of tennis this summer, and I loves it! The elite of this sport are truly gifted athletes and brilliant to watch. And of course whenever I’m watching TV I’m also on Twitter so I know there were a great many other poofs watching as well. It was then I realised… Sport is getting the gay treatment.

I don't need to say anything.

During the cricket I thought it was really weird/disturbing how many poofs were twittering about the matches. I have the shortest concentration span in the world so anything that goes for 5 days is my worst nightmare. Surely they’re not watching, I thought. Now the tennis as well! And I know that we have a gaggle of gays who go to the AFL with us, a friend also just joined a gay surfing group. The evidence seems to be everywhere. Could there have been a gay memo go out that we are now into sports?

Maybe there was a memo, or maybe I’ve just been ignorant for too many years. I thought our sporting interests were restricted to the diving and gymnastics (for obvious reasons) but it seems we are branching out. I am embracing this change! I will sample all sports now, bring it on I say. Except, of course, the NRL. I will not support sportsmen if they can’t spell their own name. Or have sex with their dog. That’s where I draw the line.

Note: Gays can use ‘poof’, straights can’t. It's Murphy’s Law.